Prologue
As a Las Vegas bottom feeder, I have a habit / hobby / obsession of poring over Las Vegas information sources for any possible deal. I have never been a big gambler, so I was always particularly attuned to offers that did not demand long sessions of gambling in order to obtain a reward. Naturally, I could not help but notice that virtually all of Las Vegas' off-strip casinos dangled juicy offers to senior citizens, like 2-for-1 buffet offers, bingo promos, slot play multipliers, and the mother lode - free slot tournaments - in order to entice their golden patrons into their doors Mondays through Thursdays. These carrots had been dangled by casino marketing departments to a greedy public via such amplifiers as Jean Scott and Scot Krause, bloggers for the Las Vegas Advisor and the American Casino Guide, respectively, and for whom I truly have the utmost respect.
One unique feature of senior citizenry in Las Vegas is that one need only be 50 years old to qualify, unlike the usual mid-sixties threshold applicable in almost every other situation. For this reason, I had been licking my chops in anticipation of my 50th birthday for many years, and envisioned a midweek destination birthday party that would require my friends to sacrifice their hard-earned vacation time for my personal ego as we would egg each other on in free bingo and slot play. Incidentally, prior to my 50th birthday, I had the privilege in playing in exactly one slot tournament: a freeroll promotional tournament that came with a free room at the Orleans during the nadir of the 2008-2010 recession. Among the 250 or so participants, I ranked precisely dead last.
Alas, as I progressed through middle age, my giddy anticipation culminated in disappointment. The pandemic and ensuing market conditions spread first-world problems far and wide across Southern Nevada. Offers to my soon-to-be demographic withered, with the free slot tournaments wilting away entirely. Station casinos closed some of their lowest-rolling casinos, and all of their buffets, apparently for good. Boyd closed all but one of their buffets, depriving me of perhaps my favorite midweek breakfast value. The American Casino Guide stopped printing, and was in the slow process of converting to a digital format. Offers at KSHP radio disappeared faster than a fractional dollar ticket left on a redemption machine encircled by slot vultures.
I would not be deterred. We would have to make do with what was still available, and make an event of it. In particular, the Las Vegas Advisor heroically continued to provide content and finagled a perfectly serviceable Member Rewards book for 2022 whose discount content far exceeded by ability to redeem it. Rumors of other angles circulated among dark alleys of the Vegas Message Board. And the ACG app actually had one or two 2-for-1 meal offers I might just be able to use.
Approximately two months ahead of time, I alerted almost everyone I could think of to my verkakte birthday couponing concept at a Sunday-through-Tuesday destination party. All but a few of my friends are non-vegas, non-gambling people, and I understand many of them are compensated quite handsomely. Ergo I had no idea if I could make coupon shlepping something worth taking time off work and flying to vegas for. I teased a hosted dinner, party favors, and the notion that we could also celebrate the birthday of anyone who missed theirs due to the pandemic. Who wouldn't want to celebrate their birthday using coupons with someone else's friends?
This was the email pitch:
50 is the New 62
MOVE OVER BOOMERS. IT’S OUR TURN TO SHINE SILVER
Dear friends and fellow Vegas trippers and karass members:
Please Save the Date for our collective 50th Birthdays and anyone else who was locked out of theirs!
Sunday June 12 through Tuesday June 14, 2022 in Las Vegas, Nevada.
Exciting party favors and a hosted dinner included!
We will embrace our inner Alter Kokkers with action-packed activities, possibly including:
• Bingo
• Serial coupon exploitation
• Free slot tournaments
• Early bird and 2-for-1 dining
• Discount movies
• Preview Active Adult Lifestyles
• Keeping the kids off the lawn
• Team prostate exams
• Old people music
• Picking teeth with one's tongue
• Sending back this food that is way too spicy for me
• Complaining about how much better everything was back in our day (the 90s)
The response was more robust than I had expected, although some people who I thought might really be able to sink their teeth into this were not able to make it. I had planned to buy an LVA membership for anyone who wanted to go on the coupon run, since I thought the cost of the membership might be a barrier to those for whom this sort of thing is not second nature, and I also felt like it was the least I could do for someone spending many hundreds of their dollars to come to my party.
Meanwhile I had an occasional long-term correspondence with Deke Castleman, editor of the Las Vegas Advisor, thanks to a few mutual interests beyond Las Vegas. I reached out to Deke with my plan and asked if he could facilitate the purchase of my gift memberships, and importantly, if I could somehow get them on a Sunday when the LVA office was normally closed. Deke was super helpful and worked with Anthony Curtis and Paula, LVA's customer service superstar, to make it possible.
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